President's Blog

The Antidote to your Anger

Wouldn’t it be wonderful to live in a world where chocolate had no calories, or procrastination was a virtue? Or your teens loved to clean their room? Or men experienced the labour of childbirth, at least once? Wouldn’t it be great to live in a perfect world? The problem with this idea is that, quite frankly, one person’s dream world may be another’s nightmare.

We don’t live in a perfect world, and so we get frustrated, disappointed, and angry. Ministry and church life is full of these things. The Bible tells us in Proverbs 14:29 (NIV), “A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly.” It’s wise to be patient when dealing with imperfect people. The New Living Translation renders the same verse this way: “Those who control their anger have great understanding; those with a hasty temper will make mistakes.”

I guess patience is really all about being slow to anger.

Legendary baseball manager Billy Martin was famous for his short temper. He tells the story of accompanying Mickey Mantle to the ranch of one of Mickey’s friends. Mantle told Billy to stay in the car while he went to gain permission to go hunting on his friend’s ranch. Mantle’s friend said yes, but asked a favour. He had a mule in the barn who was old and blind—would Mickey mind shooting it for him? He didn’t have the heart to do it himself. Mickey came back to the car pretending to be angry. Slamming the car door, he told Billy his friend had said no to hunting on his property. Mantle then declared he was going to his friend’s barn to kill his mule. Billy watched Mickey stomp off to the barn with his rifle. Mickey aimed at the mule and fired, and immediately heard two other gun blasts. He turned around to find a furious red-faced Billy Martin yelling, “We’ll show that friend of yours—I just killed two of his cows!”

Unrighteous anger can be contagious, infectious, and almost always destructive. Learning patience is the key. If anger is a learned response, then we can unlearn it. I can learn to be patient. Patience is the antidote to anger.

When it comes to anger, I can repress it (stuff it down), suppress it (ignore it), express it (which sometimes is manifested in the form of outbursts), or confess it.

Admit your anger to God, to yourself, and to a trusted confidant. Confession is the antiviral that prevents anger from poisoning our souls. It’s not the best option, it’s the only option.

 

CLERGY CARE HOTLINE

The Fellowship, in partnership with Focus on the Family and other denominations in Canada, provides a confidential clergy care hotline for pastors, missionaries, chaplains, and their families. If you need to talk to a Christian counsellor and desire anonymity, call 1-888-5-CLERGY.

This ministry is completely confidential. No one within Fellowship National or Regional staff learn who calls.

However, each quarter I do receive a report on the top ten issues being addressed in the calls. Last quarter I learned that anger was in the top ten. I encourage you to use this resource as a support to you in your ministry.